I am 42 years old and divorced. My ex-wife has custody of our two children and I send them 16 million VND per month in child support.
My girlfriend is 35 years old. We started dating a year ago after introducing each other through mutual connections. She is pretty, kind and sensitive. She knows how to make me happy and most importantly, she has no problem with my divorce.
However, his family background is rather complicated. His parents are a bit of thugs, while his older brother is independent because he doesn’t just work during office hours. He now runs his own fondue shop which only serves in the evening and simply sits at home doing nothing during the day.
I recently asked my girlfriend to move in with me. I also suggested that we register our marriage, even though I have no plans for a wedding ceremony. I told her to quit her current job, which earns her a monthly salary of 10 million VND, to also become a housewife after we got married. As compensation for this, I will give her 20 million VND every month, and she can keep the unused amount after paying our living expenses.
My girlfriend said she would accept my offer since I promised to take care of her family. She said her parents and brother didn’t have a stable job, so she wanted me to give them an extra 8 million VND per month. On top of that, I have to cover their expenses in case they get sick or involved in unexpected issues that also require money.
She also asked me to help her brother find a job, but she said the job should be undemanding so he could continue running his hot pot business.
Honestly, I’m just a director of a foreign organization based in Vietnam. My title may seem high, but in reality I am neither that powerful nor that rich.
Plus, I think if I agree to my girlfriend’s demands, her family will be able to demand even more from me in the future. They may also become financially dependent on me. My reputation may also be tarnished if I help my girlfriend’s brother find a job, but then he does it without responsibilities.
I want to find a way to both maintain my relationship with my girlfriend and avoid being taken advantage of at the same time. What should I do?
